


keep your friends close (and your enemies closer)

by trilliastra



Series: Tumblr Fics [35]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Matchmaking, Minor Lydia Martin/Scott McCall, Oblivious Stiles, Scott McCall & Stiles Stilinski Friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-23
Updated: 2015-05-23
Packaged: 2018-03-31 22:14:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,974
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3994876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trilliastra/pseuds/trilliastra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I don’t wanna talk about it.” Stiles turns his face. He’s alright, he’s had some time to think about it and he’s not angry anymore. Lydia still is the worst friend in the world, but Stiles will get over it. Eventually.</p>
<p>He’s okay, he’s totally fine.</p>
<p>Things are cool.</p>
<p>Scott shrugs and goes back to playing with the adorable cat pulling at his hair. “Fine.”</p>
<p>“She set Derek up on a date!” He spits out. Okay, maybe he’s still a little bit angry after all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	keep your friends close (and your enemies closer)

“Yo.” Stiles greets mournfully, collapsing on the floor beside Scott and pulling a kitten into his lap. This is good, this is great even, petting a cat is all he needed to make his day better.

He should get a cat. He’ll spend the rest of his life single anyway, might as well get a cat to make him company.

“Yo!” Scott says happy as a clam, scratches behind the ear of the cat he’s examining when she meows pitifully. “Oh it’s okay, we’re almost done. Soon enough you will be playing with your babies again!”

Stiles snorts. His best friend, ladies and gentleman.

“What are you doing here?” Scott asks eventually. The cat and its kittens playing happily on the floor around them. “I thought you were hanging out with Lydia tonight.”

Stiles scoffs, shakes a string in front of the kitties and smiles when they immediately start chasing it. “Not hanging out with Lydia anymore.  _Ever_.”

One of the cats jumps on Scott’s shoulder and starts to mouth at his hair, Scott arches an eyebrow, looking thorn between petting Stiles’ face or the cat’s. “Okay?”

“I don’t wanna talk about it.” Stiles turns his face. He’s alright, he’s had some time to think about it and he’s not angry anymore. Lydia still is the worst friend in the world, but Stiles will get over it. Eventually.

He’s okay, he’s totally fine.

Things are  _cool_.

Scott shrugs and goes back to playing with the adorable cat pulling at his hair. “Fine.”

“She set Derek up on a date!” He spits out. Okay, maybe he’s still a little bit angry after all. “With some girl with a fancy name and rich parents and a nice job.”  _‘Everything I’m not_ ’, he doesn’t say, but by the look on Scott’s face, his friend got it anyway.

“And Derek agreed? Even after she set  _you_  up with that girl who loved fish?” They both cringe at the memory of the date Stiles is  _still_  trying to forget.

“Yeah!” Stiles throws his arms out. That makes things even worse – he could deal with being angry with Lydia, but Derek is  _okay_  with it, even asked Stiles’ opinion on what to wear, and no. Nope, Stiles cannot be part of that. It’s too much.

“That’s nice, right?” Scott says. Stiles immediately turns to look at him like he’s a lunatic. “I mean –” He splutters once he notices Stiles giving him the stinky eye, “after last time, I thought he was over it, but it’s nice that he wants to meet other people. Right?” He asks, uncertain, and if Stiles is reading his best friend’s expression correctly, a little bit scared too. “Right?”

No, it’s not  _right_. Derek shouldn’t want to go out, he should stay home and invite Stiles to watch stupid movies with him and then they would make jokes about the characters, and Derek would see how amazing Stiles is and then they would fall in love.

But instead, because Lydia is the worst, Derek will fall in love with someone else.

Someone who will not appreciate Derek’s sarcasm, his jokes and all the bitching about food and the weather. Because that’s something only  _Stiles_  does. Stiles likes Derek’s sarcasm, likes to bitch back and spend hours teasing him. It’s his favorite pastime!

There’s no way some girl named  _Gabrielle Underwood_  will like fighting with Derek as much as Stiles does.

“What if this girl is another vampire trying to trick Derek into becoming a werewolf-vampire hybrid? You remember how  _well_  that went last time.” Stiles says, watches as Scott shudders at the memory. Vampires are the worst, Stiles kind of wishes they had stayed in Twilight.

“I’m sure Lydia would know.” Scott says placating. “And Isaac would have too, if he weren’t so interested in hooking up with the vampire’s friend back then.”

Ah, Scott, always looking at the bright side of life. Stiles would hate him a little bit for that, if it were possible to hate Scott.

“Right, well, I give up.” He waves Scott off. “If shit goes down don’t call me.”

Scott snorts, shaking his head. “If shit goes down you’ll be the first to know, what with Derek calling you all the time.”

Stiles chokes on air, blinks. “What, why would – he does  _not_! Shut up, liar!”

Scott smirks, and Stiles tackles to the floor, jabs his fingers into Scott’s ribs making him squirm and laugh. “You know I could set you up on a date too, if you want.” Scott says later, as Stiles is helping him close off. “Try to make you forget about Derek’s.”

Stiles considers the offer. “I don’t think it’s going to work.”

“Worth a shot.” Scott lays a hand on his shoulder, squeezes it softly. “It’s gonna be fine, dude. You still got me.”

“ _Meh,_ you’re okay I guess.” He snorts when Scott mimics being stabbed in the chest, and they walk to their respective cars still laughing.

 -

It’s past midnight when he texts Scott:  **“Fine, get me a nice date. Someone without a weird obsession with fish, pls”.**

Scott’s answer comes in minutes:  **“Lydia says haha.”** , then a second later:  **“You’ll love this guy!”.**

Stiles hopes he does.

 -

 He doesn’t.

It happens – in fact – the opposite.

Because the guy is a fucking douchebag. And that’s coming from someone who’s also a little bit of a douchebag himself.

This guy, though. He wins all the awards. He yelled at a waitress who got their order wrong, called the homeless guy across the street ‘useless scumbag’ and then when Stiles decided enough was enough and dumped him, he went to the bathroom and never came back. It would be a blessing if he hadn’t left the bill for Stiles to pay alone.

He’s going to kill Scott. After he makes his friend pay the hundred dollars he spent on the worst dinner of his life, that is.

What was Scott even  _thinking_?

“Stiles?” Someone calls just as Stiles was walking back to his car after stopping at the grocery store to buy ice cream. It was a really bad night, okay?

When he turns, he realizes it’s probably bound to get worse. Because standing right there in front of him, wearing a nice pair of jeans and the softest sweater Stiles has ever seen, is Derek, in all his glory and hotness.

Damn, Stiles loves him so much, it’s not fucking  _fair_.

“Hey.” Stiles answers, waves at him with his empty hand. “Nice date?”

Derek winces, shakes his head. “No. The worst, actually.”

Stiles wants to sink to his knees and thank God, but he does actually restrain himself. He can do that later – at home. “Seriously?”

“She threw wine at the waiter.”

He blinks. “What?”

Derek nods. “Yeah. It was pretty traumatizing, let’s not talk about it.” He shrugs. “What about you?”

“I had a date too.” Stiles says, waves the bag at Derek and gets a smile in response. “It didn’t end well either, so I’m gonna head home, eat ice cream and plot the best way to get back at Scott for setting me up on this date.”

“Scott?” Derek arches an eyebrow. “Scott, your best friend set you up on a bad date. That sounds absurd.”

And now that Stiles stops to think about it, it kind of does. There’s no way Scott wouldn’t know Tom was an asshole, it’s actually  _impossible_  not to notice it.

“No. No, he didn’t.” He gapes, astonished. Scott is his best friend. “He  _wouldn’t_  –”

“He wouldn’t.” Derek confirms, eyes flashing. “But someone else would.”

Stiles is going to kill Lydia.

 -

 When Scott and Lydia started dating, Stiles knew something like this was bound to happen. Scott’s puppy face  _plus_  Lydia’s brain and looks  _equals_  too much perfection for the world to handle. Stiles just thought they would go for world domination instead of pranking their best friends. But apparently Lydia’s gotten soft since she had Mel.

Or maybe she’s just taking a break.

That doesn’t even matter. He’s going to  _kill_  her.

“They aren’t home.” Derek says as soon as Stiles joins him on the porch. “And there was a note on the door.”

The note says  **“on vacation”**  and there’s a smiley face right under their names.

“What were they thinking?” Stiles throws his hands up. “Why me and why  _you_?”

Derek shrugs, rubs at his temples. “Lydia said I needed to go out more, have fun and meet other people. She said I needed to forget –” He cuts himself, blushing and with wide eyes.

“Forget what?” When Derek doesn’t answer and looks away, Stiles tries again. “Or it was  _someone_  you were trying to forget?”

Derek gives the smallest shake of his head, and he’s blushing furiously now, fists clenched. “Don’t pretend like you don’t know what I’m talking about!”

Stiles takes a step back, surprised by Derek’s sudden outburst. “But I don’t! I have no idea, dude.”

“Please,” Derek scoffs, “Lydia told me!”

“Oh? The same Lydia who set you up on a date with that awful girl?” Stiles rolls his eyes, hurt but still having no idea of  _why_. “I have no idea what you mean, Derek.”

Derek seems to relax a little, and then his shoulders are slumping like he’s completed accepted defeat. “You really don’t.” He whispers to himself, and it’s only because Stiles is so completely in tune to Derek’s everything that he manages to hear it.

“I really don’t.” Stiles confirms. “You know you can tell me anything, right? I won’t judge you.” He touches Derek’s shoulder, sighs in relief when Derek doesn’t pull back. “We’re friends.”

Derek jerks his head up, stares at him with the saddest expression Stiles has ever seen. “It’s stupid.” He says finally. “Don’t worry about it.”

“I always worry.” Stiles confesses. “Yesterday, when Lydia told me she had set you up on a date, I got really angry, because although – yeah, I want you to be happy, I still remember how weak you were after that fight with the vampire. And I don’t want you to go through that again.” He takes a deep breath. “I was actually going to your house to talk about it, but then Scott decided to set me on this date too and I kind of forgot about it. Sorry.”

Derek keeps staring at him like he didn’t understand any on the words Stiles just said. “You – Lydia told you yesterday?”

“Yes?” Stiles asks, starting to become a little confused himself. And worried. Yeah, definitely worried. Derek looks about ready to have a coronary.

“And Scott set you up on your date – yesterday?”

“Yes?”

“She told me you already had a date.” Derek says finally. “She told me you had a date and that you were moving on and I needed to get over you –”

“Move on from what?” Stiles interrupts. “Wait, get over? What – oh my God, you were trying to get over _me?_ ” Derek gets silent again, but his face gives it all away. “No! You can’t get over me! Actually, you should get  _under_  me! We should be under each other!”

“I don’t think that’s physically possible.” Derek observes, making Stiles frown and punch his shoulder.

“Of course that’s what you would focus on. You’re lucky I love you.” He throws his arms around Derek’s shoulder, doesn’t give him time to say anything back, and kisses him.

Between kisses and moans, Derek says  _I love you_  back, but they both are too busy running their hands all over each other’s body to pay attention. And it’s okay really – they will have time to say it again later.

 -

 Lydia gets really smug when they come back from vacation two days later, while Scott just looks happy and pleased with everything.

Stiles tells Mel where her parents hide the candy and counts it as a win.

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, Scott and Lydia's daughter is totally named after Melissa. That's something Scott would absolutely do, we all know it.
> 
> [tumblah](http://www.brookesbutler.tumblr.com) if you want to talk!


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